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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby sparkyoriental » Fri Jan 17, 2014 3:39 pm

I'm tired of the casual sexism exhibited by my friends, classmates, and family. I'm a computer science and math major, and the interview cycle for summer internships ended recently. I was offered several internships. Some of my classmates and friends have had a more difficult time securing employment. Naturally, the topic of jobs comes up occasionally. Whenever we're talking about jobs, research opportunities, etc., the response I get from my peers is more often than not, "Well it's easy for you because you're a girl." Or, "you get job offers because you're female and there's a lower standard for girls."

I never know how to respond to those comments because is IS true that being female helps since CS is laughably gender imbalanced and some companies deliberately try to hire more women. But I also have a 3.9 gpa, relevant work and research experience, leadership roles, and publications. I have good "soft skills" like team-work, communication, and I'm outgoing and personable.

Is this sexism? It's definitely not the blatant discrimination our grandmothers faced, but in some ways, the latent, casual, and everyday discrimination that people encounter today is more disturbing to me. It's difficult to articulate and goes unnoticed because it is so deeply entrenched in society. It's "not a big deal" and "you're overreacting." I'm just tired of it.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Renalan » Fri Jan 17, 2014 6:08 pm

I was in mechanical engineering as an undergrad. I'll say that there were a lot of under-qualified girls or girls with zero passion/engineering sense/knack for it getting internships/employment. I think it's a fair to say that as a percentage, more women find positions/offers than men in the field.

On the other hand, you do have very impressive grades and anyone with a 3.9 GPA and good personal skills are shoe-ins for internships.

I think it's a really long-term issue at work here. Societal sexism brought this situation about in the first place, sort of affirmative action-employing women in engineering, which leads to the casual sexism/grudges your male friends hold. This in turn devalues the women who actually excel in the field.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby sparkyoriental » Fri Jan 17, 2014 6:50 pm

Renalan wrote:casual sexism/grudges


I know it was probably unintentional and I do understand what you're trying to convey, but your wording is essentially equating sexism with grudges and is in itself, devaluing.

I agree with your points about the quasi affirmative action in STEM employment for women, but I'm doubtful that employers are willing to overlook any actual deficiencies in ability or competency just to rebalance the gender inequality. The more important point about societal sexism is not that this affirmative action exists, it is why is this kind of affirmative action even necessary? Young girls and boys attend the same public schools and get the same education, but girls choose to study less science and math because of largely social pressures.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Renalan » Fri Jan 17, 2014 8:28 pm

I didn't mean to imply that sexism is equal to grudges. I honestly don't think the wording really suggests that either.

I wanted to gear my reply towards the idea that some males hold grudges towards women who are perceived to be less-qualified (perception only), who seem to be able to easily land jobs.

Given the state of sexism and casual sexism being generally accepted in society (acceptance as in, no guy chides another man for using a woman + sandwich joke), I think it is easy for males to feel disenfranchised (strong word for this, can't think of anything else) in this situation.

but I'm doubtful that employers are willing to overlook any actual deficiencies in ability or competency just to rebalance the gender inequality.

This simply isn't true. For various reasons, the most qualified candidates can and are frequently passed over.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby charybdis » Sat Jan 18, 2014 1:24 am

On another topic. My cousin texted me to tell me that he bought clothes that fit.

How exactly is one supposed to respond.

Why am I the person to tell this to.

I am having an existential crisis.

Send help.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby sparkyoriental » Sat Jan 18, 2014 1:37 am

Renalan wrote:I didn't mean to imply that sexism is equal to grudges. I honestly don't think the wording really suggests that either.

but I'm doubtful that employers are willing to overlook any actual deficiencies in ability or competency just to rebalance the gender inequality.

This simply isn't true. For various reasons, the most qualified candidates can and are frequently passed over.


Your our response conflates a lot of reasons ("various reasons" - what reasons?), while I was focusing on one reason, gender. I completely agree - sometimes the most qualified candidate is overlooked - but I find it logically dubious that any company would hire an incompetent and unqualified engineer solely because of her gender.

At risk of sounding pedantic, the reason I found your original comment to be poorly worded is because by using "/" to separate sexism and grudges, you are effectively placing them in the same category when the two are not at all the same. For example, you structure "internships/employment" and "positions/offers" together because they are functionally the same in that particular context. Grudges and sexism are very different, and you are devaluing sexism in the way you worded that phrase.

Renalan wrote: I'll say that there were a lot of under-qualified girls or girls with zero passion/engineering sense/knack for it getting internships/employment. I think it's a fair to say that as a percentage, more women find positions/offers than men in the field.


That is an assertive and bold statement to make. The fact that you follow up "underqualified girls getting internships/employment" with "it is fair to say more women find positions/offers" leads me to infer that you think that more women find positions than men because more women as a percentage are incompetent, but get hired anyways because they are female. Do you have any actual evidence to back up any of these claims? For example, to play devil's advocate, from a different pov, there are proportionally just as many male as there are female unqualified and passionless engineers. The incompetent women just get more attention and derision because they are women.

These comments are just an example of the undercurrent of prejudice that I was talking about earlier. I understand exactly what renalan is trying to say, but the way he is saying it in his word choice and sentence structure offend me. Like I said earlier, I can't even articulate exactly WHY. In fact, I feel silly nitpicking his comment like I'm doing a close reading, but his post and his followup make me uncomfortable. I don't think he's purposefully being sexist with his wording and truthfully, I'm not sure if his comments could even be considered sexist. I feel like I'm overreacting, and maybe I am. Thoughts?

Other examples of the subtle sexism I see everyday is I've noticed that my female friends are very frequently interrupted by men during class. Whenever a female student answers a question, I've noticed that male students tend to jump in and interrupt her while she is speaking, oftentimes by just restating exactly what she just said but in different words. I think the reason why is that female students (in my anecdotal experience and hypothesis) tend to answer questions less assertively and confidently compared to men. She can be just as sure of what she is saying is correct, but for whatever reason, be it social, cultural, or some other reason, she frames her response with uncertainty. I know I am guilty of answering questions with statements that sound like another question ("uptalk") not because I am actually uncertain, but because for whatever reason, that feels natural to me.

Whew, that was a big block of text and rambling. Thank you to renalan for your responses to my original comment. I rarely think about stuff like this and it's nice to once in a while.

edit: I just reread that monolith. Had a couple beers earlier so apologies if it's incoherent or illogical.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Stingray Sam » Sat Jan 18, 2014 2:04 am

I definitely don't feel like you're overreacting. I find that a lot of people shrug off statements that make overarching conclusions about women or minorities while the same people would get offended if you made those statements about them and whatever social class/race/gender they belong to. I think that in some instances where feminism or some sort of racial integration takes effect and balances out former inequalities that you tend to see a lot of people in the majority feel like they are being cheated out of something due to external forces pushing equality rather than a genuine consideration of all people and choosing the best candidate regardless of race/gender/social class/etc.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby bels » Sat Jan 18, 2014 5:43 am

You know you're effay when you're dissatisfied with zips.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby verilyvert » Sat Jan 18, 2014 8:05 am

sparkyoriental wrote:I'm tired of the casual sexism exhibited by my friends, classmates, and family. I'm a computer science and math major, and the interview cycle for summer internships ended recently. I was offered several internships. Some of my classmates and friends have had a more difficult time securing employment. Naturally, the topic of jobs comes up occasionally. Whenever we're talking about jobs, research opportunities, etc., the response I get from my peers is more often than not, "Well it's easy for you because you're a girl." Or, "you get job offers because you're female and there's a lower standard for girls."

I never know how to respond to those comments because is IS true that being female helps since CS is laughably gender imbalanced and some companies deliberately try to hire more women. But I also have a 3.9 gpa, relevant work and research experience, leadership roles, and publications. I have good "soft skills" like team-work, communication, and I'm outgoing and personable.

Is this sexism? It's definitely not the blatant discrimination our grandmothers faced, but in some ways, the latent, casual, and everyday discrimination that people encounter today is more disturbing to me. It's difficult to articulate and goes unnoticed because it is so deeply entrenched in society. It's "not a big deal" and "you're overreacting." I'm just tired of it.


Having been an engineering student, I was once equally cynical of the benefits women and other minorities seem to enjoy at the expense of others with better qualifications. A couple things changed my thinking however. First was understanding the difference between equality and equity, and why equity is needed, and second was working briefly in STEM education for children, and seeing the effects of gender bias firsthand.

Equality assumes an equal footing. If you were to divide a thanksgiving turkey equally among a family, everyone would get a share the same size. Equity, would divide that turkey based on fairness, or need. Larger portions for adults, smaller portions for children. Similarly in an isolated example, if you have two bags of groceries, and a homeless person has none, an equal distribution of groceries would be one bag for you and one for the homeless person. An equitable distribution would be that the homeless person gets both bags, because that person is at an inherent disadvantage, and you presumably have a home with a fridge and more food.

With respect to STEM majors, women unfortunately are at an inherent disadvantage. Statistically, they are underrepresented, get paid less for the same level of education, and occupy fewer CEO and high level management positions. Having hiring policies that favour women, is an equitable approach to hopefully one day achieve equality in the workplace.

My uncle who studied engineering in the 70s, expressed equal frustration with the preference companies had for hiring black graduates. When I studied, this was no longer a common hiring policy, as many (but not all) of the racial disadvantages of the 70s had been overcome by the time I was in school. This change happened partly through equitable hiring policies, as well as the culture shift that such policies promote. Currently where I am, hiring in STEM is skewed towards women and first nations (native americans). To me its not hard to see that both groups have their own disadvantages and need equitable policies to create a more equal workplace.

Much of the casual sexism sparkyoriental described I feels comes from the kind of thinking I once passively held, where men and women have their natural differences/strengths and weaknesses, and that such differences were largely responsible for the gender gap seen in certain workforces. Of course you could be anything you wanted to be, and there were always exceptions, but the rule stood. I don't believe this at all anymore. There are no differences/strengths/weaknesses between genders that I've seen that make anyone more or less competent at math, chemistry, engineering; whatever. What I do see is a society that places expectations on boys and girls to conform to images of what they ought to be.

One of the best examples I've seen of this is this SMBC comic:
Image

Besides the obvious, blue is for boys, pink is for girls type expectation that the comic pokes fun at, there are biases within how STEM education is even presented to kids. sparkyoriental's anecdote of women being stepped on in class while trying to answer questions hits home for me. While teaching coed children's classes on engineering, I saw that boys would frequently overpower girl students to answer questions, and tinker with projects. It wasn't until the girls were given STEM instruction in a girl only environment, that they really thrived, and almost always surpassed the progress of the coed classes. That aptitude, excitement and interest was always there, it just had to be fostered in a safe environment where the students were free to approach the presented problems in their own way. Thats not to say the girl only classes were full of quiet meticulous young scientists free from obnoxious boys. They were always the rowdiest group to teach (smiling)

The umbrella organization I worked under was called Actua. If it interests anyone here is a small publication they did on the importance of engaging girls in science and engineering. I'm sure they've done more detailed research on the topic, just wish I could find it.

I think I'll wrap up by saying that you, sparkyoriental, need not worry too much about a company's hiring policies. You're right of course, that they would never hire an incompetent employee. You should be proud that you've worked so hard to achieve the hard/soft skills, and good academic standing that you have. The opportunities you get, are the ones you worked for, and don't let someone else's jealous sexist remarks take away from that.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby odradek » Sat Jan 18, 2014 9:58 am

Renalan wrote: I'll say that there were a lot of under-qualified girls or girls with zero passion/engineering sense/knack for it getting internships/employment.


sparyoriental wrote:I agree with your points about the quasi affirmative action in STEM employment for women


verilyvert wrote:hiring in STEM is skewed towards women and first nations (native americans).


given that all three people that are discussing this agree on this point, it seems to me that the casual sexism of sparkyoriental's peers is overstated. if there is a quasi-affirmative-action movement to build equity (equity, i think being something we can all agree is a good thing), then people complaining about girls getting jobs because they're girls is not necessarily unfounded. the issue is dismissing the other hard work and skills a woman has but if we're going to look at the bayesian model of all-skills-equal-except gender, is there a real bias towards women? maybe, maybe not, who can tell without data? if we're going to work on the assumption that there is, though, then buckle up and own the privilege or perception of privilege (since we're whipping out terms like that), even if it comes with other shitty baggage
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby bels » Sat Jan 18, 2014 1:11 pm

Broke up with the GF the other day. It was my choice but I don't feel particularly great about it. Feel kind of crappy and confused. Seinfeld led me to believe that breaking up was more fun.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby kyung » Sat Jan 18, 2014 4:07 pm

A friend passed away last night. We weren't extremely close, but we were track teammates and I woke up to all of this news that she was gone.

I took a long walk this morning and it scared me how numb I am to this initially. I wasn't the best of friends with her in the first place, but it just seemed so surreal to hear that a person that I interacted with, spoke with, joked around with, was gone. She was a star athlete, a very smart individual, and a beautiful woman. It made me feel very aware of this stone cold concept of death. My dad called me this morning after the news had spread to tell me he loved me. I picked up his call during the middle of my walk and I could hear his voice cracking a bit over the phone. He told me to be careful and that he trusted me. Consequently, a funeral procession happened to pass by at this very moment, and it was almost surreal how this whole scene played out for me. I simply said, "Ok dad, I love you too." It wasn't in an impersonal way, but just an acknowledgement and appreciation for his care.

It was a really beautiful afternoon after a fresh snowfall and I was standing on this big bridge that spans a river near my school. The wind blew around all the loose snow on the ground and made the sun made everything sparkle in this fantastical way. I hung up his call and just broke down right there, knowing that today and for the rest of their lives, someone's parents wouldn't have the luxury of saying "I love you" to their kids.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby seth83292 » Sat Jan 18, 2014 4:45 pm

Kyung, I know what you mean. One of my decently close friends took his own life last year, and I remember not knowing how to react to it.

I was on the T with my friends on the way to get tapas and sangria when one of my friends called me saying "Did you hear what happened to Steve, he passed away last night". I vividly remember my friends around my laughing and joking around me and just feeling completely confused. He was so happy, so nice and so loved. This must have been a mistake. The rest of the night was a complete blur, because I didn't tell my friends, and I just was sorta shell shocked the rest of the night.

When I had got home, his parents had put up an online memorial where you could write a little message to him and his family, and reading through everyone's memories of him, and writing some myself was so bittersweet. I don't think I cried, but I know there were tears while I was smiling at those stories. I wasn't able to make it to his funeral, being 6000 or whatever miles away, but I hope he is at peace.

It still hasn't completely sunk in, a year later. When I went home for winter break, I thought to myself, "Oh, I should text him and see what he's up to." before remembering.

It was my first real encounter with someone close to me dying. I consider myself very lucky for not having to experience the pain of a close relative dying, and this was a hugely new experience for me. I did not enjoy it.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby SisterRayVU » Sat Jan 18, 2014 5:01 pm

Towards the point of sexism or affirmative action or whatever, grades came out last night in school. I did alright and beat median but I hardly beat it by a lot and I don't exactly have a large enough buffer to feel comfortable going into On Campus Interviewing in August. I should be able to do a little better this semester which ought to make me feel alright, but I'm still bummed.

There were a couple black 2Ls (second years) chilling with us and playing FIFA, crushing some beers, and obviously we don't talk about grades aloud, but I think I was pretty clearly sad and sort of lost. It doesn't feel good to be right around the middle. But they were talking about how things work out alright and how it's not as bad as it seems, etc., and I know they were just being friendly (not speaking to me but to us in general) but I couldn't help but think 'Dude, you're black. You could be in the bottom third and you'll have a bevy of job offers. A straight, white male in the middle third can strike-out.'

I like affirmative action. I think it's important. I don't know how this contributes to the discussion. It would not be incorrect to state that they are less qualified. Objectively, they are. That said, they deserve the help. It may not have been earned but it has been deserved. I imagine it is similar with women in STEM except that it sounds like the sexism is a lot more open. I think that adds a layer of discouragement that is absent in a lot of ways from blacks or minorities. I don't know.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby freddy » Sat Jan 18, 2014 5:55 pm

bela wrote:If you want to have a conversation about clothes without people negging you then try talking about their clothes rather than your own. It's not the same kind of conversation you will get on the internet but it's not less valid because of that.

Also never tell people how much you spend.


I'm guilty of not following this strictly. For me, I have a lot of "boundary" issues with myself, so the impulsivity reeks and I sometimes can't help but to answer a question bluntly and without more attuned emotional/empathic regard. However, at the core, if the person really wants to know that bad, and is judgmental about it, then obviously we have progressed a different course in the relationship. For me, clothing has become a huge "identity" and means of self-expression, and if someone can't handle that, then the onus is on them. Understandably, I come from a more humble and disadvantage (urban at-risk youth) environment, so irregardless of clothes, the fact that I aspire and ascribe any attempts to move socioeconomically upwards, can unveil massive cognitive dissonance for those whom you were friends with growing up.

What's ironic is that in the land of hype beasts and yeezus, flashing the dolls dolls bill mentality, people at the core can still be butt hurt despite subscribing to a subculture of conspicuous consumption and false bravado.

I think its unfortunate that we have to see reality for what it is, and that although we all collectively bonded together in youth, will unlikely hold true in individual life trajectories. I know for me, I have utilized fashion/clothes as a means to thwart off – or procure detachment – from the, in many ways, dysfunctional environment I grew up in. Rather, it has opened up a new dimension of people and human connection despite being in relatively the same locality as I did prior to delving into fashion. I am fortunate that I was able to grow up with very diverse socioeconomic backgrounds and embrace such relationships, where as some of my friends remain relatively confined to their similarly equalizing demographics.

More importantly, my endeavors of self-discovery in fashion has made me a lot more resilient and understanding of other personalities and socioeconomic backgrounds. People converge from all faucets of life, with their own ideas and feels about embracing fashion, and there are circumstantially different thresholds and ability to allocate financial resources for self-expressive endeavors. I realize fashion has had to make me come to terms with my own background and choices, relative to others in the realm of the fashion we all interdependently congregate together. We can always perceive someone above or lower of you on the socioeconomic ladder. However, it is a false dilemma to feel vulnerable with status anxiety, to then re-orienting into a conditional either-or relationship as we open up to more intimate and personal details.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby freddy » Sat Jan 18, 2014 6:58 pm

SisterRayVU wrote:Towards the point of sexism or affirmative action or whatever, grades came out last night in school. I did alright and beat median but I hardly beat it by a lot and I don't exactly have a large enough buffer to feel comfortable going into On Campus Interviewing in August. I should be able to do a little better this semester which ought to make me feel alright, but I'm still bummed.

There were a couple black 2Ls (second years) chilling with us and playing FIFA, crushing some beers, and obviously we don't talk about grades aloud, but I think I was pretty clearly sad and sort of lost. It doesn't feel good to be right around the middle. But they were talking about how things work out alright and how it's not as bad as it seems, etc., and I know they were just being friendly (not speaking to me but to us in general) but I couldn't help but think 'Dude, you're black. You could be in the bottom third and you'll have a bevy of job offers. A straight, white male in the middle third can strike-out.'

I like affirmative action. I think it's important. I don't know how this contributes to the discussion. It would not be incorrect to state that they are less qualified. Objectively, they are. That said, they deserve the help. It may not have been earned but it has been deserved. I imagine it is similar with women in STEM except that it sounds like the sexism is a lot more open. I think that adds a layer of discouragement that is absent in a lot of ways from blacks or minorities. I don't know.


I had a discussion with my friend about affirmative action earlier this week. We both come from pre-college environments where underprivileged minorities make up the majority. We both agree that affirmative action has really resulted into being an academic disservice because most students, including us and listening to hearsay, are more often times than not, undeniably underprepared at semi-comeptitively ranked higher education institutions. We hear many stories of egos being crushed once inner-city friends realize they are struck with the rigors of academia, serving as the great equalizer for upholding/cultivating respective intuitional standards.

As much as affirmative action and the therein scholarships that underwrite such opportunities, does not overpower the institutional desire to preserve the collective collegiate self-image of a student body with competitive SAT and GPA scores. If I recall correctly, the NYT and other press semi-recently has been reporting that elite institutions are having a challenging time soliciting and bidding for academically-able students for affirmative action. In the end, the biggest folks whom are critics of AA are those whom are, and/or feel, competitively qualified but unaccepted, or perhaps those whom feel insecure in their own academic achievements/performance.

My take is that the core issue isn't about lowering standards for affirmative action. Instead, it lies a fundamentally precursory and underlying issue, where dysfunctional and inadequate college preparation fails to prepare high school graduates to compete on the same "leveled-playing field" caliber of the student population in academia, is an ultimate disservice and disrespect for everyone. The issue is with lackluster high schools and having qualified and competent teachers not flee for educationally top-peforming suburbs. And the issue originates further with lackluster students from subpar middle-schools. Precursory to the previous, is the issue is that there is a lack of family structure and ideal family dynamics to warrant effective rote learning and intellectual self-discovery.

It is a seemingly unending amalgamation of varying, albeit interconnected, issues, where affirmative action is only the tip of the iceberg.

For women in STEM, my take is also that lowering standards isn't the way to go, especially for a field and academic discipline so meritocratic as STEM. The issue lies upon the cultural deficits of not embracing women in such fields, particularly not seeing, or be able to realize, females in roles of critical and technical thinking. I suppose we can use affirmative action to serve as an "invisible hand" to equalize the playing field, but I think it would be more advantageous to conduct and inspire STEM in women, early-on in their life as a child. I'm all for believing that to have core influence and interest starts, and works best, with the young.

Obviously the accelerated and immediate rise for the interest in STEM in this 'new normal' of a globalized economy causes us to be time-sensitive and privy to insta-gratification. It is not an overnight route to have all spheres of communication mediums transporting culture to make it more culturally accepting for females to embrace STEM. Correct me if I'm wrong, a lot of contrived pushing of STEM for "women" begins in high school? If anything, I think we collectively as a society is in an awkward mid-phase of trying to catch girls half way in their adolescent development, for there is just only a beginning effort in acculturating girls to envision such career pathways. It needs to be earlier, much earlier.

Converging two disparate and distinct villains whom seem to bear scapegoating for their unique positions for special opportunities, lies the fact that affirmative action does not address core structural issues that it seems the discussion as a whole tend overlook. Many attack affirmative action because many feel partially affected by it – connecting their own respective circumstances. However, aside from feeling personally invalidated, not many are willing to see beyond or focus on improving the core issue – putting this secondary to theirs. I don't fault the ones maximizing their self-interest falling in place of affirmative action programs, though if we are to really address personal dissatisfaction, it isn't with them, but it should be directed on how policies and culture around this issue is shaped.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Whype » Tue Jan 21, 2014 1:54 am

Coming to terms with the fact that I've used a relationship with one of my girl-friends for self-gratification instead of an actual friendship. It sucks to see how I've lied and told her how much I cared for her when I really just liked the way she made me feel about myself. I exploited her at an emotionally vulnerable time in her life and I don't even feel that shittily about it. I guess I was just trying to get in her pants the whole time. :/ (How) Do I talk to her about it?
Edit: How tf is a 'relationship' supposed to work?
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby starfox64 » Tue Jan 21, 2014 2:19 am

so are you broken up or breaking up or what? are these things that she has accused you of or did you come to this conclusion on your own? because if it's not something you guys have discussed then i probably wouldn't just straight up tell her that you were using her just to assuage your guilt.

you should be honest with her but at the same time you don't need to make her feel like shit.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Bryan » Tue Jan 21, 2014 6:12 pm

So like, I met this girl online and we hit it off pretty well, I get her number and all that and she starts flirting hardcore, like she's really into me and all that.

Normally this wouldn't be an issue, but I have mixed feelings about this, I like her, but I dunno if I really want a relationship, I'm a delicate little flower who's legit never been in one, never even had a first kiss. I can't accurately describe what i'm feeling but I guess i've been alone for so long i've become accustomed to it, not talking to anyone but 1 or 2 friends, going on places like 4chan and MFA's GD to discuss my feelings and get advice.

Suddenly this pops up and it seems so, weird. I dunno how to go about breaking how I feel to her. Has anyone experienced what i'm feeling or something similar?

Any and all advice is appreciated.

TL;DR: Very used to being alone, potential partner comes in and I feel confused/weird.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby agvs » Tue Jan 21, 2014 6:20 pm

@Bryan you like her. She likes you. See where it goes. No need to talk to her about it right now. Don't let your head get in the way. Of course a relationship will be odd if you've never been in one. Just let it play out.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby chilljin » Tue Jan 21, 2014 7:13 pm

im eating 2 waffles covered in honey with crushed snickers inbetween, toasted and its making me feel complete
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby odradek » Tue Jan 21, 2014 10:33 pm

@Bryan trust other people to not be terrible
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby smiles » Wed Jan 22, 2014 1:46 am

I had lunch with daedelus. And he's playing later tonight ^_^
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草地跑過的腳印
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby b4my » Wed Jan 22, 2014 8:04 pm

smiles, he used to be the general manager of the college radio station I work at! My friend ran into him on a train once and they talked about the radio, apparently he's really nice.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby Catfush » Wed Jan 22, 2014 10:10 pm

I had a math class at 8 this morning and there were obviously a few people that looked like they had just rolled out of bed. However, this kid that sat down in front of me skeeved me the fuck out. He had cat hair all over his hoodie and he smelled like he hadn't showered in a week. I feel like I'm usually accepting of most people, but this guy just grossed me out. Time to sit in the front row!
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby ohnodeadchickens » Thu Jan 23, 2014 1:18 am

My sister fainted after her swim practice early today. My parents took her to the hospital to see what happened and it turned out to just be due to dehydration, but Jesus Christ I don't think I've ever been that scared in my life.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby freddy » Thu Jan 23, 2014 5:32 am

I finished my program earlier this evening and when I arrived to the metro feeling ecstatic then I proceed find a $10 bill on the floor. Like shit, I need to wear my glasses more often. I felt too guilty to keep it once I saw the lady that is always bumming around at the station as we had a very good conversation about mental health sharing my leftover pastries two weeks ago and she asked me for .50 last week when I didn't have any cash (nor was I willing to give anything to her), so I gave the bill I just found to her as a one-time thing.

I'd be interest in the learning about the psychodynamics of her life if I bump into her again. She's gonna have to give me some cool and interesting as fuck stories now.

Speaking of street-people, I wonder what happen to Leeroy ;_; He had some cool stories, a nice jizz, and was cool-chill as fuck.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby bels » Thu Jan 23, 2014 6:00 am

@Freddy how do you rate the feeltalk thread. What would you say is the overal psychic health/status of care-tags?
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby jrisk » Thu Jan 23, 2014 10:30 am

ohnodeadchickens, my sister fainted in a piano factory once. we were having a tour and she locked her knees I guess. It is pretty scary.
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Re: feeltalk thread

Postby anonomous » Thu Jan 23, 2014 7:26 pm

I have a really bad case of Impostor Syndrome. I feel so empty sometimes (i know we all do) but the worse thing is i feel incompetent or 'not enough' to everyone else in my life in which i respond by being more generous and helpful to everyone else in my life.
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